Three Things You Need to Know About Cheating

In everyday life, cheating is an act of dishonesty in a relationship, both between humans, themselves, and to God. In the large Indonesian dictionary, the word cheating means hiding something, not being straightforward, being dishonest.

Cheating is often around us, cheating identically with dishonesty in romantic relationships, both dating and marriage. Cheating usually reminds us of the behavior of being in a "third person" relationship outside of an "official" relationship.

The following is a review of some of the frequently asked questions about cheating

1. What are the boundaries of cheating?

Cheating is behavior that violates relationship commitments, which in turn hurts trust in the relationship. Therefore, the boundaries of cheating are different for each partner, depending on their respective relationship commitments.

Therefore it is very important to discuss the boundaries of commitment in each other's relationship to avoid feeling betrayed because the behavior does not violate the boundaries of the partner. Although the boundaries about cheating can vary, there are three criteria that can be used as boundaries for cheating.

Initially, physical attraction. An affair initially begins with physical attraction to the opposite sex who is not an official partner. In fact, it's natural to be attracted to someone. However, it can be dangerous if there is emotional closeness and confidentiality. Also read: Is cheating a mental disorder Also, cheating doesn't have to involve physical contact or sexual relations. In modern times like this, we can easily make "friends but intimate" just with online applications or internet chat rooms.

Broadly speaking, there are two types of cheating, namely cheating with the heart and cheating physically.

2. Why does someone cheat?

There are several reasons someone may cheat. First, he considers that cheating is normal. This is manifested in an environment where the place supports cheating.

Second, for a number of reasons. Initially, you may feel that your partner cannot be relied on to meet their needs. It is possible that he had tried to complain, but did not think he was getting the right response. As a result, he distanced himself, even starting to compare partners to other people. When a person meets another person who can understand him, then an affair occurs.

3. What do you do if you find out that your partner is cheating?

As the party who was cheated on, it is natural to feel disappointed, hurt, and angry. The trust in your partner will decrease. It was hard to believe in him again. In these circumstances, it is advisable to calm down and seek social support.

You can, seek support from family or close friends. After calming down somewhat. Express your feelings for your partner and talk. This can be difficult, but it is necessary to know the next steps. A researcher named John Gottman explained that an affair is not to be forgotten, then just move on, go back into a relationship with your partner as if nothing had happened.

It's hard to talk about each other's feelings about the affair. It is very important to understand the various reasons for an affair. If the cheating partner shows an indication of apologizing, is able to see the positive side of the partner, and wants to change. So give him a way, and help him fix it.